Learning & Growth

More Than a Guide

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Janet Holm McHenry has breathed life into my prayer life through her book.

I first referenced it in a post last month and took another month to finish it. Like eating red velvet waffles (Yes, that’s a thing. Had them for the first time this week. May I have another, please?), who wants to rush the goodness.

The first three words of the book’s title is true and is achieved, yet I find it to be so much more. If it breathes life into a spiritual discipline, then it’s easily described as life giving, potentially life changing.

The first indicator came from this simple suggestion in the introduction:

I pray for whatever God puts in my eyesight.

Needs some context probably. Janet was describing her shift from having a structured approach to prayer while she walked her neighborhood to praying based on what she believed God was putting in sight in that moment. That computes with “pray without ceasing” in my dictionary. Adoption #1.

I appreciate each chapter’s dedication to one prayer by Jesus. The three that had the most impression to my spirit were chapters nine, twelve, and thirteen.

A love that breeds unity is a subtle form of evangelism…Unity overlooks the faults of others who may not yet be living up to their potential, because unity knows those folks are growing in the right direction. (Chapter 9, “Jesus’ Prayer for the Church”)

Our “why” prayers are not a lack of faith; they are simply a lack of information. (Chapter 12, “Jesus’ Prayer in Abandonment”)

A prayer of submission actually is an act of strength. (Chapter 13, “Jesus’ Prayer of Submission.” She wrote this in reply to quoting Richard Foster: “It is the prayer of relinquishment that moves us from the struggling to the releasing.”)

Adoption #2, having a deeper understanding and awareness of praying for unity

Adoption #3, honoring the heart of anyone’s “why” prayer

Adoption #4, appreciating the movement and strength in submission

Her book is more than a guide. Take a read and see if you agree.

DONE

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When I tuned into the Olympics yesterday afternoon, a wrestling match was on. Wrestling is definitely one of those watch-only-every-four-years sports. So I left it there. And then this happened.

The wrestler had just won the gold medal. But it wasn’t his first. It was his fifth…in the same event…over five Olympics! He’s the first to do that. INCREDIBLE!

After celebrating, he went to the center of the mat, took off his shoes, and left them there as the sign of his retirement. Read more about him, Cuban wrestler Mijain Lopez, here.

One could have several takeaways from this scene. I’ve landed on two.

One, it’s a great goal to be able to say, “It’s done. I finished what I set out to do.”

Two, it’s a sign of a healthy mind to say, “I’m done with this part of life. I did my best. It’s time to go after my next best.”

Got any DONE goals? What will it require for you to say, “I did my best”?

Square Footage

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For most of us, at the end of our lives, our lives are going to come down to the square footage of a hospital bed. –Rabbi Steve Leder

Rabbi Leder said this in an interview on the podcast Everything Happens. Something we don’t want to hear. Yet, if we allow ourselves to ponder it, this truth is lifegiving.

I’m not really there, but in natural fashion, I’m thinking ahead a little too much. The “there” I’m referring to is downsizing. I already live in less than 800 square feet. How much more downsizing can I do?

The downsizing I’m thinking about is more along the lines of stuff, not necessarily space. There’s only so much that can join me in a hospital bed. And that makes me wonder, “How can I best gradually work my way there?”

I’m guessing it’s more about what’s in my mind and heart when my body says, “This is all I need.” Between now and then, here’s to filling my mind and heart with things that don’t require earthly square footage-answers to the prayer, “On earth as it is in heaven.”

P.S. Here’s a question: Exactly how much square footage will we get in heaven?

Photo by Alex Tyson on Unsplash

Praise: A Well-Taken Reminder

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For the last three weeks I’ve been focused on a question, a personal spiritual dialogue that I’ve shared with a few others. The question could be stated several ways, but what I’m after is an answer that enriches/refreshes relationship with God. Here are variations of the question:

  • Which is more important, focusing on what God does for us or who He is to us?
  • In my experience in the Church, is the focus on what God does or who He is?
  • What do my prayers reflect, a focus on works or on identity?
  • How do believers achieve balance between doing for and with God versus being with and knowing God?

In ways I’ll never be able to explain, the timeliness of reading the right book at the right time surfaced again this afternoon. I recently picked it up off clearance at Books A Million.

In Chapter 4 entitled “Jesus’ Prayer of Praise,” McHenry shared that Richard Foster says adoration has two forms, praise and thanksgiving. Thanksgiving expresses appreciation for what God has done; praise acknowledges who God is.

This struck me through a simple word-praise. I have been contrasting the words adoration and thanksgiving without thought to the word praise. Accepting this teaching that they are really all the same brings some relief to my analytical brain.

That final question in the list above comes from how I’ve been approaching prayer the last three weeks. I’ve leaned more in the adoring lane than the thanking or asking lane-an effort to discipline my focus on relationship. A reminder to praise is well taken.

By the way, in this chapter McHenry shared a terrific list to help us all improve our adoration. Seemed worth sharing.

Working From not For

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This is my third and final post reflecting on Dutch Sheets’ The Pleasure of His Company. Chapter 29, “The Connection,” was the highlight for me. Maybe because he references Old Testament characters I’ve been reading about the last few weeks. But I’m pretty sure it’s because he drills down on a topic I’ve been chewing on, again, for the last two weeks. What matters more, who you are or what you do?

That’s not really his intention, but that’s where it goes. And, for the record, he doesn’t really give you an answer. Here are my four highlights for illustration:

  • “At times, the most spiritual thing we can do is the most natural and practical. Work is practical yet very spiritual; feeding hungry people is, as well; nurturing our children is practical, time-consuming, tiring-and very spiritual. Keepin’ it simple is sometimes keepin’ it spiritual.”
  • “To be holy doesn’t mean being separate ‘from sin,’ but rather ‘unto God’…Holiness isn’t sinlessness.”
  • “…strength lies not in the perfection of my outward performance but the connection of my inward heart.”
  • “There’s a vast difference between performing for acceptance and performing from acceptance.“

There’s a noticeable difference when a relationship has shifted to from away from for. Sometimes others can see it better than you; sometimes not. If you’re really not sure, the best person to check in with is your Creator. He knows what it means to live from illustrated by instructing Moses to tell everyone, “I AM sent me.”

Go with what He tells you. If He says your offering brings him pleasure, that’s all you need. You’re in good company.

Photo by Jon Tyson on Unsplash

God’s Nature: Lording or Loving?

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Sheets continues in the next chapter of The Pleasure of His Company to dig into aspects of our relationship with God. He zeros in on a belief that God’s nature is misunderstood. A misunderstanding of God’s nature would certainly explain why worship can lack passion, be endured, or even resisted.

I don’t believe the problem with most believers’ worship is hypocrisy or insincerity. I think the majority is trying to honor God by giving Him His dues and fulfilling their obligation to Him as the Creator. I doubt if most of them understand, or have even heard, that God is a lover as well as a Lord. And it wasn’t his lording nature that prompted him to create us-He could have made a few billions more angels had that been His desire. It was his loving nature. God is a Father at heart.

Chapter 2, “The Seeker”

This morning I got to talk with a guy at church for the first time and found out he works for a local, family-owned business. Between their six locations, they have over 800 employees. Describing being employed there he said, “You work hard, but it’s like family. We have a hard time finding good employees, but we continue to grow and I love working there.”

He’s describing a work place that isn’t only about lording. We all pretty well can tell the difference between lording and loving. If you come from a faith setting that focuses more on a lording view of God’s nature, it’s probably long overdue for your relationship to take a shift and consider his loving nature.

Photo by Rod Long on Unsplash

The Worshiper’s Reward

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Dutch Sheets begins his book The Pleasure of His Company by focusing on God as a Person. From the outset, he emphasizes the opportunity we have to experience intimate relationship with God.

The last paragraph of the chapter focuses on what worship is about from the position of the God being worshipped, in this case through the avenue of singing.

When we worship, He is captivated by the singer, not the song. Our company is what He longs for.

Chapter 1, “The Person”

This is good news for all worshipers. Some worshipers can sing the song flawlessly yet miss the joy of God’s company. Some worshipers have no shot at “being in the pocket” yet enjoy the freedom of God’s presence. Sheets called these worshipers enlightened.

They know that when they approach Him, He responds; and the pleasure of His company becomes their reward. Make it yours.

Photo by Hudson Hintze on Unsplash

Two Tips for Journaling

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Finished the last page of my current journal this morning. Always produces more thoughts and musings. Figured I’d share two of them for other journalers out there.

Question #1: Do I really need to keep them forever?

A few years ago a coaching client revealed they had every journal they’d ever written. So when they revealed how attached they were to them and expressed their bondage to the past, we went down the road of determining what might be healthier when it comes to keeping old journals. After they did some purging, they genuinely felt free from some of their past.

I since have developed a boundary of only keeping journals from the past five years. That’s my healthy mark. If you have never thought about this, it’s worth pondering. It’s possible there’s some freedom available for your heart, mind, and spirit.

Question #2: How often should I look back?

It’s another question based on what’s healthy for you. I took a few minutes this morning to purge and remember. The timing that seems right for my looking back is roughly twice a year. What I noticed this morning were two interesting emotions. Some entries still resonated strongly, strong enough to keep for future remembrance. Other entries that seemed intense when they were experienced were easy to release.

I have no idea how other journalers approach purging and remembering. If you have reflections to share, please do. Or maybe chew on it in your next entry. Either way, may your journaling continue to bring you health and freedom.

Perseverance

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Catching up today on one of my favorite podcasts, Being Known.

It’s season 9. They are reviewing chapters from Curt’s latest book, The Deepest Place to deepen our understanding of suffering and the formation of hope.

I hadn’t finished episode 7 on Perseverance, so that’s where I picked up. It was interesting timing.

I’ll post the video for the entire episode for you to view, but here are the lines that spoke most to me:

When we are willing to persevere, we discover over time that we are becoming something different than who we were…It’s often the case that we are not the first to recognize that…Someone else who’s watched us would say we are not the same person.

I love being able to point this out to my friends. They’ll say something that either shows their growth or reveals they have yet to see it. I try to interject my observation to reinforce the work they’ve done, the change they’ve accomplished, and the encouragement to keep going.

Need a shot of reinforcement? Check out the episode.

Love As Being

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When you lose your ability to care, you lose the thing that makes you human: your heart. –John Sowers, chapter 24 “Love As Being,” Say All the Unspoken Things

At first read, I thought to myself, “I’ve had heartless moments, even a heartless season. How did that happen?”

To be fair to myself, the moments and seasons that come to mind weren’t complete loses of caring. They’re better described as misdirected, distracted, or too much in the weeds that I forgot the big picture. And by big picture, I’m thinking more about all the relationships in a setting versus a select one or two.

So how did that happen?

Selfishness. There was a moment I upstaged some dear friends. I was so caught up in my own story that I lost sight of their story. Thankfully, they didn’t lose their heart.

Demanding Justice. There was a season I was determined to right a wrong. No one asked me to; no one gave me permission. Thankfully, that season came to an end before I lost heart.

Abusing Power. There was a moment I carved a wound with a hasty decision. In that moment, I chose perfection over mercy. Thankfully, that scar reminds me what power can do to my heart.

The chapter title of Sowers’ quote is worth noting. The less I care about doing and more about being the more loving I am.

Thanks for saying the things, John Sowers.

Photo by Isaac Quesada on Unsplash